Short Stories, Uncategorized

I asked for a raise but got a pay-cut instead!


For the approval of a creation lies in the hands of the Creator alone. No other can truly speak to its worth quite the same way.

You see, every three years I raise my rates in order to keep my business afloat so as not to be seeing red at every turn. But inevitably, this rate increase usually causes a huge upset in my cash flow as some clients cancel service because they don’t have the budget to keep up. I am usually not too surprised by this because it is these same clients who cause me to operate at a loss in the first place. They usually want/request more work than everyone else but are too cheap to pay the rates to go along with it or can’t afford to do so. In short, they don’t see or appreciate the true value of the service my employees and I provide (the ones who appreciate us never complain and are happy to pay extra to ensure we never leave).

As the new rates took effect March 1st, one such client, unappreciative of our true value, sought it best to use an incident from almost 2 yrs ago (an employee did something rather stupid which caused a lot of grief to both the client and our company) as the reason for canceling service which I thought was rather odd. Was it her pride that didn’t allow her to give the real reason for cancelling — lack of finances? Or was she a threat that needed to be eliminated now before she became malicious later on citing said incident from 2 years ago as her reason? To be honest, I don’t know, only she and God really know the truth. But I am glad I got to see her true nature now.

To rectify the issue back then, I offered her a refund (which she declined to accept), filed a police report (she did and I gave the employees relevant info), terminated the employee and continued to provide the best possible service we could given the circumstances. We granted favors that were not necessarily part of our job description, but weren’t terribly inconvenient to carry out — anything we could think of. The fact that she would wait almost 2 years, all the while referring other clients, laughing and talking normally every time we were there as if nothing happened, to say she expected us to do MORE  and that I should have INSISTED she take the offer by not charging her for subsequent visits, is what gets me! Such people scare the crap out of me and I stay far far away when I am aware of their true nature.

Delegation was a foreign term to me and it was a daily struggle to relinquish control to others and even to God! It is for this reason that I spent many years operating my business alone (no employees) for the simple fact that I was notorious about quality control. (Control freak? Yes. OCD? Yes. Therapy needed? Yes — I am in session NOW since writing IS my therapy). But when I decided to hire help as maternity leave was imminent, above said client supported my decision wholeheartedly (at least so it seemed at the time) and said she understood that there was a lot to do and she would not mind if I kept on an assistant even after maternity leave. I was thrilled at the prospects of growing my business, but nervous to the core because I knew I had set the bar very high and an assistant would dilute the quality somewhat.

Nevertheless, I tried and tried to develop a formula to make ANY assistant successful like other franchise operations do with a set way of doing things, e.g Mc Donalds, but ultimately the one failing point wasn’t the formula but the integrity of the employee. I was doomed to fail just on that one factor alone since my job was so personal-data-personal-space sensitive!

Over the years, employees have come and gone, and I’ve seen the financial rewards remain steady when I was the only one — no dilution. And with that knowledge I am now faced with the enormous decision of whether to keep things as is with the employees that remain or scale back once again to the army of one — just me. I am also flirting with the idea of a completely different career altogether, one that offers human contact, but with a safety bubble of sorts in place, kind of like blogging — interacting with people but from a distance.

Not knowing a person’s true intentions, and having been burned many times because I gave people the benefit of the doubt only to have them prove me very wrong, is where my mistrust comes from. Inherently, I believe in second chances, as so many second chances have been given to me by others who genuinely care and ultimately by my heavenly Father. So for this reason, I strive to be more like HIM, but human nature is unpredictable, and with that knowledge I have often been heard repeating the phrase, “I will like you more if I saw you less”. Sad, yes I know, but my quest to find genuine friends/companions has always left me with a mild distaste for human contact when bonds made were eventually broken due to the hidden agendas of others, forcing me to keep my distance as a form of self-preservation.

It is not until you appreciate your own value or self-worth then others around you will understand they need to meet your set standards or move on. Allowing others in with different values/standards will do one of two things: force you to lower yours or force them to raise theirs. Playing the waiting game to see which ultimately happens is dangerous unless you both know going in that there is mutual need for growth in a specific direction –up!

My mom once told me that I am way too picky and if I wanted to find a mate I must lower my standards a bit. I thought back then that since she’s my mom she, more than anyone, would know what’s best for me, so I took her advice and in the end saw negative results. I have since learned to take ALL her advice with a grain of salt, as they say, since she and I see and do things very VERY differently.

I am still learning, still growing, still aspiring to be more, to be better, to be stronger, wiser, kinder, etc etc. But the one I have my eyes set on is Jesus for it is only in HIM that I can be all those things and without HIM I an nothing! He knows my worth for I am His creation — we all are — AND humanity would be in much better shape if we all focused our sights and aspirations on HIM!

Image Source: Yahoo images (

Contents written: March 12 2015  |  Copyright 2015 Moylom Enterprises


2 thoughts on “I asked for a raise but got a pay-cut instead!”

  1. Oh, how well I understand! We are all His works in progress. We’ll get there.Keep up this good therapy! And thank you for honoring my words there. I can’t tell you how much that means to me.

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Thanks!
    The funny this is, I had this story in my head twisting it in so many directions and also wondering if I should tell it at all. But it kept clawing it’s way to the surface, refusing to be buried. Then when I read your post on self-worth it hit me – – yes, the story was all about knowing your worth and separation from those who don’t. I don’t like being used, but it is we who allow ourselves to be used if we don’t stand firm for our beliefs, values, rights, self-preservation etc. It was an Aha moment and I had to give credit to the source – – you!

    Stay blessed and happy Spring! (if only Winter would play fairly and let someone else have a turn)


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