We’ve all had bad days! Right? We all have had mornings when we’re in a rush to get out the door and at least 10 things go wrong as if to sabotage the one day we planned to get to work early, as opposed to barely making it to the time clock before the 7 minute grace period expires!
Yep, I’ve been there! Just this past Sunday I planned on taking my daughter to the park super early to avoid the hot sun and the crowd. We love having the park all to ourselves which gives me a chance to be a big goofball as she challenges me to keep up with her: climbing, swinging, ziplining, and what ever else she dares me to do.
But on Sunday, just as we were getting dressed, doggy peed on her bed before we had a change to take her for a walk. This single event created an avalanche of work to do before we could even leave the house: replacing the dog bed linen, washing the dog, mopping the floor, scrubbing the tub and me taking a shower. Ugh!!! My daughter had a mini-meltdown and admittedly, so did I. Our plans were ruined! By the time we got to the park an hour later, it was hot and crowded so we didn’t stay that long. Bummer…
Later on that day, my munchkin and I watched funny cartoons, looked at cute dog videos on Instagram then went for a long walk together and of course, our doggy got to tag along. Despite the rough start to the day, we found a way to enjoy our time together and in the end that’s what really mattered.
Conclusion, in the midst of all the frustration, we can either have a meltdown or choose to go with the flow and rationalize that someone else out there in the universe is having a worse day than we are, making our situation that bad after all!
So, to help brighter your rough day, here’s a little pick-me-up to get you through this temporary rough spot. And just remember, Rachel Understands! Enjoy!
Life is cyclical…
Things come then they go.
Such is the case with
Fads, Friends, Money, Love,
Power, Youth, Seasons
And even Life itself!
Patience, courage and hope/faith
Are the tools needed
To see us through
To the next phase/cycle.
There is no need to fight it,
Just embrace the change
And press on…
~ Moylom Enterprises ~
Contents written: April 13 2015.
Contents edited: May 2 2015.
Copyright 2015 Moylom Enterprises.
Today’s gym visit, an unforeseen day off, arrived on the heels of a thorough workout yesterday. I should have been resting my muscles a bit, but since I won’t get another workout in until next week, and I also needed to shake off this funk I’ve been in the past few days, I figured I might as well make the best of the free time.
I was cautioned to stay away from running until my body was stronger, but the elliptical machines don’t give me the burn I yearn for deep down. Yes, they get the blood pumping and the muscles moving but something always feels insufficient. So determined to get rid of the sadness I’ve been feeling lately, I walked right past those darned ellipticals and headed for the row of empty treadmills.
I picked one against the back wall so my demise, should it come, wouldn’t be witnessed by many. I selected the random setting, as memories of running the course in Prospect Park, NY and how great I felt afterwards flooded my mind vividly. Far be it for me to pick something easy to start off with, oh no!!! I had the audacity to select level 3 at a pace of 5 mph. Try running at that pace with hills as a new runner? “You’ve lost your mind!!!” my brain screamed. “Yes, and I’m going to run until I lose my aching heart too!” I snapped in brazen frustration.
5 minutes of hell
I punched in my weight (I will never tell) and the time (20 mins) then hit start. The closed captioned TV turned on and I was off. Two minutes in, my pace was strong, my breathing was fine, then the first incline indicator blinked on the monitor— a hill was up ahead! I began to feel the pressure, my lungs needed more air, my heart was pumping harder, and I needed to focus on my breathing. Eyes off the TV, I looked down at my feet – “FOCUS!!!” My lungs were struggling by then, the first 5 minutes are by far the hardest of any run, “Breathe dammit, BREATHE!!!” My pace was steady, my heart was pushing, I was almost at the top of the hill, and I felt my lungs open wide. They got the air they needed; I was no longer panting (and coughing); I was finally breathing at a normal pace, I think… Either that, or I was about to pass out!
The course finally began to decline, THANK GOODNESS! My pace was perfect, and I was actually able to follow along with the show ‘The Talk’. It was almost ten minutes by then and I was getting tired. I needed to take it easy if I had to make it the other ten. So I slowed my pace to a 3.7mph brisk walk to regain my composure. I felt my abs tuck in as my core steadied my balance – Nice! That is what I’d been missing! That was the rush of distraction I needed to chase away the blues! I gathered my thoughts; increased my pace to 4.7 mph and started running again.
5 minutes of heaven
I looked down at my feet again to focus on my breathing. It was easier now that my heart was at maximum output, so I steadied myself and drank it all in. I was sweating hard and I was NOT gonna stop ‘til the clock said 20 mins. I was giving it all I had and I could feel the burn! I remembered the days of doing a 3 mile, 60 min run, nonstop, EASY! But there I was struggling to do a silly 20 minutes. Then I remembered how long it took me to get to those first 20 minutes back when I was new to running. So I cheered myself up,
“Chin up Chica, you’ll be running 3 miles again in no time, just make it to this 20 mins. One step at a time, girl, you’ll be fierce again, you got this!”
Well I did make it to 20 mins, and I felt really proud of myself. And then I remembered the high – that natural high I always got from a good run. My body was finally awake; no need for a second, third or fourth cup of coffee to get me in gear. I was feeling the burn and loving it — that was my little slice heaven.
So here’s to the good days that cancel out the bad. Chin up my friends, baby steps until you’re ready for longer strides. I believe in you YOU’VE GOT THIS!!!
Yesterday, in one of our marathon phone conversations which meandered from one topic to the next, we eventually landed on the topic of family and friends. At that point I informed mom that should any relatives begin inquiring of my whereabouts and/or well being in the upcoming months it would be because I’ve stopped making it a top priority to check on them on a regular basis. Why? Because I’ve drawn a line in the sand and it’s been long overdue. You know what she said? “I don’t blame you?”
Someone told me once that I care too much and I was shocked that those words were said about me. I don’t know how to NOT care — it’s the way I was made. I always go above and beyond and it’s just the way I am. My clients have said how much they appreciate that quality, but for some reason family and friends take advantage of my kindness or simply don’t appreciate it. But with age comes wisdom and I’m now understanding what that individual meant, which leads me to the new-found explanation of those words heard so long ago:
It’s not that I care too much but that I need to be more wise about the things and people I care about.
Hmm… why didn’t I understand this years ago? Perhaps because I spent so many of those years trying to make everyone happy not realizing the impossible task with which I burdened myself.
Caring takes a lot of energy and emotion. It forces one to put oneself in another’s shoes to truly understand, if only slightly, what that person is going through and what they need to feel better if down or to share in celebration of the good times. For some reason I’m good at that, and many folks have often asked if I am/was a nurse. (I actually thought of becoming a nurse once, but later discovered I was trying to fulfill my mom’s dream not my own. But that a whole other post!!!). No I’m not a nurse, it’s just a God-given gift I guess, just something that comes naturally.
So, now I’ve begun the task of eliminating those folks who fail to understand that emails, phone calls, what’s app, viber, text messages, Facebook messenger and all other modes of communication WORK BOTH WAYS!!! I am no longer going to be the only one to reach out, I’ve done it that way for too long and now it must stop. If the thought never crosses their minds to say hello and actually do so then I too will not do so. A friend recently reminded me how awful it is to “give to the point of resentment “. Yes I know, I know, God loves a cheerful giver, and all these years I HAVE been cheerful about the care and consideration I gave to others. I didn’t care if those folks reciprocated, I was just happy to remember their birthdays, anniversaries and delighted to check in to see how they were doing. But how come they never remember to inquire about me? And that right there is the problem and why “the line” needed to be drawn.
I’m not the needy type; I don’t ask for anything; I’m independent and never in trouble (not much anyways) so I’m wondering if folks automatically think I’m OK and there’s no need to check on me. Well I’m not gonna sit here and speculate, I don’t have time for that. As I get older I’m less tolerant of the lack of consideration shown by others and as such have drawn a line to signify my decision.
Wow, I just reread the above and boy do I sound angry! Well I am. It’s time to worry about my needs after all these years of neglect by others and sadly by me.
I messaged a very dear lady whom I was fortunate to meet during a very dark period of my life a few years ago. I’ve been so grateful for her support that I always check in with her from time to time. She actually got angry with me for speaking mostly of my kids and not of myself. She said,
Everytime I hear from you, you go on and on about the kids, about how well they’re doing and how much they’re thriving but what about you? How are you? How is your personal life? Are you dating? Are you working on a life separate from your kids? I hope you’re not locking yourself away from love? Please know that you deserve love too!
At first I got upset that she had somehow set a timetable for my life without my permission. Here I was thinking my personal life was my own! (Aside from WordPress of course). I knew fully well that I’m not ready for all that, and unsure as to when or if I ever will be. I’m still learning to trust again, terrified of failing as a parent — a single parent — and only capable of worrying about one day at a time given everything else I have on my plate. Dating and new relationships take time, and I’m not ready to invest such a valuable asset (my time) without adequate returns. I know my dear friend means well so I’m not angry that she was stern but I need to spend a little more time weeding my garden so the beautiful flowers can bloom and be seen — I’m gonna spend some time pampering “me”.
So here’s to laying the dead to rest to make room for the living — new life — new beginnings! Here’s to moving on at my own pace, one step at a time.
Thank you Ms K for caring enough to be stern. I’m not mad. Happier updates ahead I promise! ((Hugs)) ^_^
Contents written July 15 2015 | Edited: July 18 & 21 2015 | Copyright 2015 Moylom Enterprises