Quote from “Shakespeare’s Sonnets” by William Shakespeare –
“Weary with toil, I haste me to my bed,
The dear respose for limbs with travel tir’d;
But then begins a journey in my head
To work my mind, when body’s work’s expired: For then my thoughts—from far where I abide— Intend a zealous pilgrimage to thee,
And keep my drooping eyelids open wide, Looking on darkness which the blind do see: Save that my soul’s imaginary sight
Presents thy shadow to my sightless view, Which, like a jewel (hung in ghastly night, Makes black night beauteous, and her old face new.
Lo! thus, by day my limbs, by night my mind, For thee, and for myself, no quiet find.”
I held you in my arms today
Waiting for you to wake up.
It’s been a while since I held you like this —
Watching you sleep,
Marveling at how much you’ve grown,
Thankful to be given such a gift.
Being with you like this is rare these days
Since you no longer stay still.
There’s so much you MUST explore
So much you MUST show me
Some much you MUST ask me
The only thing that silences you is sleep.
It’s amazing how it transforms you
From chaos to calm
So I can see my sweet angel,
My little princess, My treasure
Not the beast you pretend to be.
I’m sorry I’m always busy in your presence
I fear that you are learning
to not be still from me.
Even before you were born
I carried you with me —
constantly working, constantly busy;
In many respects you are me.
I am an army of one,
Never relied on anyone else
To do for me
What I could do for myself.
I see these traits in you now,
even at three
And though your independence
makes me proud
I fear it will have you
following in my footsteps —
Not needing anyone —
not wanting anyone!
But that’s a lie!
I do need people
To inspire, to encourage
To listen, to care
And what’s more,
I’ve always wanted you!
BUT my introverted nature,
Can only tolerate
external stimulation for so long
Before I must flee to my inner cave
For solace, for silence, for peace.
It is from that place I gain strength
To face the madness again.
It is my desperate need for silence
That makes me misunderstood.
My actions are not meant to hurt
Or cause offense.
My efforts to shut out the world
Are only so I can enjoy it on my terms.
So sleep my little one
As I cherish this moment
For in a few short minutes
You will be awake
Causing chaos as usual,
And in a few short years
You will be grown and gone
And this will only be a memory.
Contents written: March 23, 2015. Edited April 1, 2015 | Originally published: April 2015 | Copyright 2015 Moylom Enterprises
I smiled today, not because I needed to pretend to be happy but because I actually was! There was a sense of peace and calm surrounding me — my troubles seemed to fade effortlessly away. I looked out to the sea but the rain was in the way, so I looked at the rain.
The sound, ever so soothing, brought back fond memories of my childhood. No school, just home under the covers. A day to spend in bed reading a good book, napping or watching movies. Trips to the kitchen, slow but deliberate, are to retrieve comfort foods: hot chocolate, soup, popcorn or what ever else that was easy to bring back to the bedroom or to the sofa to make the lazy day one to remember.
I smiled today, because I didn’t have to brave the elements or feel rushed or overwhelmed. Instead I was able to sit still and just be. I have been longing for moments like these for some time and I’m so glad they are finally becoming a reality.
I smiled today because I’m free to feel however I want just for me — feels like I’m floating as a leaf downstream; not fighting the currents, just willingly going along for the ride.
*Originally published: January 2015
Contents written: January 12 2015 Edited: January 29 2015 | Copyright 2015 Moylom Enterprises